Sunnats and Aadaab of the Guest – 4

16. The guest should not eat all the food which the host serves in the serving platters or utensils. Rather, he should leave a little food so that the host does not think that the food which he prepared was not enough and that the guest was not satisfied.

Note: This does not mean that the guest should leave some of the food on his plate uneaten as this is against the sunnah. The guest should fulfil the sunnah by cleaning his plate with his fingers.

17. The guest should ensure that he protects his gaze from looking at haraam while remaining in the home of the host. He should not look at the womenfolk of the home.

Similarly, he should not pry into the personal affairs of the host by enquiring from him about them nor should he be inquisitive and start touching the personal items and things of the host and his family (e.g. by opening drawers and cupboards, etc.)

Accordingly, he should refrain from doing anything in the home of the host that he is not required to do.

18. When the guests enter the room or eating area where they will be served the meals and they find that the food is placed on the dastarkhaan (eating cloth), then they should not commence eating. Rather, they should wait for the host to tell them to commence eating.

However, if after entering the room or eating area, the host serves the food to them, then they may start eating as this is a sign of permission from host.

حدثني وحشي بن حرب، عن أبيه عن جده، أن أصحاب النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم قالوا: يا رسول الله، إنا نأكل ولا نشبع، قال: فلعلكم تفترقون؟ قالوا: نعم قال: فاجتمعوا على طعامكم، واذكروا اسم الله عليه، يبارك لكم فيه قال أبو داود: إذا كنت في وليمة فوضع العشاء، فلا تأكل حتى يأذن لك صاحب الدار (سنن أبي داود، الرقم: 3764)

Hazrat Wahshi (radhiyallahu anhu) reports that the Sahaabah (radhiyallahu anhum) once complained to Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) saying, “O Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam), we eat but do not feel satisfied.” Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) asked, “Perhaps you are eating individually?” The Sahaabah (radhiyallahu anhum) replied in the affirmative. Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) then advised them to eat together.  Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) said to them, “Eat together and take the name of Allah Ta’ala at the time of eating, Allah Ta’ala will place barakah in your food (through which you will be satisfied after eating).”

After quoting this Hadith, Imaam Abu Dawood (rahimahullah) mentioned the following, “When you are invited to a walimah (or any other invitation), and you find that the food is placed (e.g. on the dastarkhaan), then do not partake of the meal until the host gives you permission (to commence eating).”

19. Without the permission of the host, it is not permissible for the guest to give any portion of food to a beggar or to any person who is not part of the invitation.

Similarly, the guest should not take any portion of the food home for his family etc., except if the host permits him to do so.