INTERACTING WITH ELDERS – PART FIVE

1. If the task that your seniors ask you to carry out is not manageable for you, then politely and respectfully excuse yourself.

2. If you notice your elders making a mistake, then do not be hasty in correcting them immediately, as it is possible that you have not understood the situation correctly. Hence, when you find a suitable opportunity, then respectfully enquire from them regarding the matter. In this way, if they had made a mistake, they will be able to correct themselves, and if you had misunderstood the situation, they will be able to clarify your misunderstanding and guide you correctly.

3. If you do not live near your asaatizah (teachers) and elders, then too you should maintain contact with them by phoning them and occasionally taking out the time to visit them. In this manner, you will be able to maintain a good relationship with them and continue to benefit from them.

4. When in the company of your elders, maintain a high level of respect. Do not do anything that will amount to disrespect e.g. raising your voice while speaking to them or standing in front of them with your hands in your pockets.

5. If your elders are engaged in some ibaadah or work and you wish to speak to them or discuss some matter with them, you should wait for them to complete whatever they are engaged in. When waiting for them, you should wait at a slight distance so that they are not disturbed by your presence. Thereafter, when they complete their ibaadah or work, you may meet them and discuss your need with them. In this manner, you will not disrupt their programme nor inconvenience them.

عن عمر بن الخطاب قال: خرج رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم، فلم أجد أحدا يتبعه، ففزع عمر بن الخطاب، فأتاه بمطهرة، فوجد النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم ساجدا في مشربة، فتنحى عنه من خلفه، حتى رفع النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم رأسه، فقال: «أحسنت يا عمر حين وجدتني ساجدا، فتنحيت عني، إن جبريل أتاني، فقال: من صلى عليك من أمتك واحدة صلى الله عليه عشرا، ورفعه بها عشر درجات (المعجم الأوسط للطبراني، الرقم: ٦٦٠٢)

Hazrat Umar (radhiyallahu ‘anhu) reports that on one occasion, Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) went out to relieve himself and there was no one present to accompany him (to assist him to make wudhu after relieving himself). Hazrat Umar (radhiyallahu ‘anhu) then came out and followed Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) with a utensil (of water). (When he reached Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam),) he found Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) present by a small pond in the state of sajdah. Hazrat Umar (radhiyallahu ‘anhu) then moved away and sat behind Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam). He remained waiting for Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) until Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) lifted his head from sajdah. Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) then mentioned to him, “O Umar, you conducted excellently. You moved away and waited for me when you found me in the state of sajdah. (I had prostrated before Allah Ta‘ala out of gratitude because) Jibreel (‘alaihis salaam) had come to me and said, ‘The one who recites durood upon you once, Allah Ta‘ala will send ten mercies upon him and raise him by ten stages.’”^[1]

[1] وقال العلامة الهيثمي رحمه الله في مجمع الزوائد (الرقم: ٣٧١٧): رواه الطبراني في الأوسط والصغير ورجاله رجال الصحيح غير شيخ الطبراني محمد بن عبد الرحيم بن بحير المصري ولم أجد من ذكره